What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

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RickBoglehead
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by RickBoglehead »

Anyone who says they have no regrets in life is being dishonest, especially to themselves. I have lots of regrets (we're retiring in ~50 days, although the pandemic basically retired me last year).

I regret not retiring sooner (early 60s now). Life is too short. People die too young.

I regret ever buying single stocks. Had I gone the mutual fund route from day one, I'd be better off.

I regret playing the dot.com boom. Lost money, never to be recovered.

I regret being risk adverse and not starting my own business 25 years ago. I explored a business (brewery) a few years back, but it's not worth the effort this close to retirement.

I regret...

See, we all have them.
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DurangoWino
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by DurangoWino »

Retirement is like recess at school.
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beernutz
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by beernutz »

DurangoWino wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 3:28 pm Retirement is like recess at school.
With no back-to-class bell.
Don't gamble; take all your savings and buy some good stock and hold it till it goes up, then sell it. If it don't go up, don't buy it. --Will Rogers
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cheese_breath
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by cheese_breath »

DurangoWino wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 3:28 pm Retirement is like recess at school.
As long as you don't lick the flag pole in the winter.
The surest way to know the future is when it becomes the past.
EnjoyIt
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by EnjoyIt »

TheTimeLord wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 7:44 am I must admit I am very envious of people who are easily able to fill their days in retirement. I have zero understanding of what they are doing to fill their days.
Although not retired, I'm semi retired and have more days off than work days. Here is what my day yesterday looked like.

7am: Woke up eating a good healthy breakfast. Relaxed for abit surfing the web and having coffee.
9am: Off to the gym. At the gym I swam for about 30 minutes, sat in the sauna for 10 minutes, showered, and changed.
10:30am: On the way home stopped at home depot to pick up some stuff I need for a project I'm working on and then to the supermarket to get some food for lunch and dinner.
12:30pm home for lunch where I had my second cup of coffee and relaxed.
2pm worked on a wood project described above.
4pm left to hang out with some friends.
8pm wife and I eat our own dinner followed by a movie.

I had a few other things I was hoping to do yesterday but ran out of time as usual. Worked on some of those today, but again ran out of time. There just isn't enough time. I didn't get to practice the guitar or continue with the current book I am reading.
A time to EVALUATE your jitters: | https://www.bogleheads.org/forum/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=79939&start=400#p5275418
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bligh
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by bligh »

surfstar wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 9:25 am
JoeRetire wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:26 am
KlangFool wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:16 amIt is just a job. You are paid to do it. There is nothing more or less to it.
For most people, there is more to work than just getting paid.
No. I think you have it backwards. For some people.
+1.

I believe JoeRetire is thinking of more self actualized and higher paid positions. Positions, where people have some ability to dictate and control their work environment, or else find themselves another position that does. It is how people mention Warren Buffet hasn't retired and continues to work in his old age.. Why wouldn't he want to continue to work? He has no boss to report to, and complete control over who he works with, what he works on and how much he works on it.

The vast majority of the people are not in that situation.
Keenobserver
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by Keenobserver »

JoeRetire wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:26 am
KlangFool wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:16 amIt is just a job. You are paid to do it. There is nothing more or less to it.
For most people, there is more to work than just getting paid.
I would disagree with this. Most of humanity works because the absolutly have to, not because that is where they find their
" meaning." There are more things to do in life than be a corporate slave. Most people will never been seen at work again if they could help it.
SQRT
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by SQRT »

Keenobserver wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 4:17 pm
JoeRetire wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:26 am
KlangFool wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:16 amIt is just a job. You are paid to do it. There is nothing more or less to it.
For most people, there is more to work than just getting paid.
I would disagree with this. Most of humanity works because the absolutly have to, not because that is where they find their
" meaning." There are more things to do in life than be a corporate slave. Most people will never been seen at work again if they could help it.
Right but Joeretire didn’t say how much more. Surely there is at least a little more for quite a few people. “Most” or “some” is debatable for sure. I would say in developed countries it could be most. Maybe not in third word countries. But we generally aren’t talking about them here. Surely, not all people who work for corporations view themselves as “slaves”?

Anyway, seems like a pretty fine point to put on this important question.
nigel_ht
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by nigel_ht »

Arabesque wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 7:30 am
HanSolo wrote: Wed Apr 21, 2021 11:29 pm The Atlantic ran a piece that illustrates the problem of loss of relevance, and why that might be even harder for people coming out of more prominent positions. It offers ideas on how to make the transition to a different phase of life, so that it doesn't wind up seeming empty.
https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/ar ... ne/590650/

OK, so I've been posting on Bogleheads quite a bit lately... I need to go get a life away from the screen.
Your life on the screen is valuable. Sharing this article helped a lot of us.

I have been struggling with my retirement and feeling the loss of my career. I'm almost 70, but probably would not have retired so soon without the Covid push. I now know to move on to Vanaprastha. Of course, first I have to define Vanaprastha . . . what it means to me, that is.
Same. The last couple days I've dusted off my resume and polished it and was about to send it off to Amazon. I figure I have a capstone project left in me...but you know what? I don't need to spend it working on my resume.

My plan prior to seeing the Amazon posting that caught my eye was to get a teaching cert so I'm going to continue that path instead. So thanks for shooting first.
Thegame14
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by Thegame14 »

but just the word retire isnt the same anymore. They say that something like 30-40% of people have a side hustle and for me "retiring" may just be that I leave my regular job to focus on my "side hustle" but that side hustle might be a 10-20K per month business that I grew over time. LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG gone are the days where you work for a big corporation and stay there for 30 years and get a watch or some trinket and have a corner office and pension plan... that world died like 30-40 year ago, so those people who got purpose maybe were part of that looooooooooong lost world, most of us work for 7 plus companies in our life, get laid of at the drop of a hat due to a recession or a startup goes under, and we have absolute ZERO care for a company and get ZERO satisfaction bouncing around seeing countless CFO after Greedy horrible boss CFO ruin company after company by chasing double digit growth due to some stock bonus, and ruining the company along the way.....
flyingaway
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by flyingaway »

bligh wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 4:15 pm
surfstar wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 9:25 am
JoeRetire wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:26 am
KlangFool wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:16 amIt is just a job. You are paid to do it. There is nothing more or less to it.
For most people, there is more to work than just getting paid.
No. I think you have it backwards. For some people.
+1.

I believe JoeRetire is thinking of more self actualized and higher paid positions. Positions, where people have some ability to dictate and control their work environment, or else find themselves another position that does. It is how people mention Warren Buffet hasn't retired and continues to work in his old age.. Why wouldn't he want to continue to work? He has no boss to report to, and complete control over who he works with, what he works on and how much he works on it.

The vast majority of the people are not in that situation.
Maybe Buffet does not like travel, fish, play with grandkids, eat at Bangkok night markets, etc. But that is OK.
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bligh
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by bligh »

flyingaway wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 5:28 pm
bligh wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 4:15 pm
surfstar wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 9:25 am
JoeRetire wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:26 am
KlangFool wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:16 amIt is just a job. You are paid to do it. There is nothing more or less to it.
For most people, there is more to work than just getting paid.
No. I think you have it backwards. For some people.
+1.

I believe JoeRetire is thinking of more self actualized and higher paid positions. Positions, where people have some ability to dictate and control their work environment, or else find themselves another position that does. It is how people mention Warren Buffet hasn't retired and continues to work in his old age.. Why wouldn't he want to continue to work? He has no boss to report to, and complete control over who he works with, what he works on and how much he works on it.

The vast majority of the people are not in that situation.
Maybe Buffet does not like travel, fish, play with grandkids, eat at Bangkok night markets, etc. But that is OK.
The point is that it is easy to keep working when you are able to travel, fish, play with the grand kids, eat at bangkok night markets and so on, when you feel like you want to. There is literally no one there to tell him he cannot. He doesn't have to ask for time off. He doesn't have to get it approved, he doesn't have to have his boss tell him he cannot take that much time off in one go. He doesn't have someone telling him they need him to go ahead and come in this weekend. He doesn't have a boss period. He is working for himself. It is easy to keep working into your 90s in that type of situation.

Don't feel like working today? No problem. Call your secretary, and delegate the work you were going to do to someone else or just do it later.
Need a vacation? Send out an email and let people know you will be gone.
Feel burnt out? Go to some fancy retreat out in the Maldives to meditate
Don't like this one client you are working with? Fire them.
This project is getting boring? Give it to someone else to work on.

This isn't a black or white state, for each job/role in the workforce there is a continuum from "no control whatsoever" to "complete control in all aspects". We all sit somewhere on this curve. As a rule of thumb - The lower your pay, the more easily it is done by someone else, the fewer your options, the more financially insecure your position.. the lower you sit on this curve. The higher your pay, the more in demand your skills are, the more options you have and the more financially secure your position.. the higher you sit on this curve. At the tippy top end you have the financially independent and self employed.
av111
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by av111 »

Wannaretireearly wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 6:27 am
SQRT wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 3:29 am
HanSolo wrote: Wed Apr 21, 2021 11:29 pm

The Atlantic ran a piece that illustrates the problem of loss of relevance, and why that might be even harder for people coming out of more prominent positions. It offers ideas on how to make the transition to a different phase of life, so that it doesn't wind up seeming empty.
https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/ar ... ne/590650/
Very useful, interesting article. Thanks for posting. I can especially identify with the goal of developing and maintaining social connections. My spouse and I make a conscious effort to keep contact with our friends. Many of these are friends we have developed since retirement through themed travel, volunteering, or other normal connections (hairstylist, masseur, etc). One potential risk of retirement, or getting older in general, is social isolation.
+1 very good article. Makes me want to plan now for post retirement activities that are eulogy, not resume, building!
+1 Eulogy building.. that's a sobering goal!
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by lws »

None.
SQRT
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by SQRT »

av111 wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 6:29 pm
+1 Eulogy building.. that's a sobering goal!
Yes, that thought occurred to me as well. But I think the point is a good one. The kinds of things that people mention in a Eulogy are not things the subject gets to say, only his loved ones do. In the end that’s all we got, what our loved ones thought of us. I don’t think there is anything wrong with thinking that way while we are still alive. Do you?
Normchad
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by Normchad »

SQRT wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 7:17 pm
av111 wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 6:29 pm
+1 Eulogy building.. that's a sobering goal!
Yes, that thought occurred to me as well. But I think the point is a good one. The kinds of things that people mention in a Eulogy are not things the subject gets to say, only his loved ones do. In the end that’s all we got, what our loved ones thought of us. I don’t think there is anything wrong with thinking that way while we are still alive. Do you?
I’ve never heard a eulogy like “Ted was a good man, and a loving father. But that lazy jerk could have worked another year....”

I don’t think I’ll have any professional regrets when I retire. But it is honestly a fear I have. Once I jump out, there is no jumping back in.
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by bdaniel58 »

I will retire this year maybe in Aug or Sep or Oct. I will be 62.

My only regret is several investing mistakes and not finding this site sooner.

I told my manager in Feb that I planned to retire this year, probably in Aug. Anyone can be replaced, but it will take more than 2 weeks to replace me. He and the company have been good to me, so I wanted to give them plenty of lead time. He really appreciated the heads up and was very supportive.

All the people I work with, know and are supportive. I was given a very fun, challenging project as my final assignment this year so my end date is flexible. I originally planned on Aug because even with maxing out 401k contributions, I could not work much longer this year without going over the ACA subsidy cliff. Biden's $1.9 trillion package eliminated the cliff so now my end date can be flexible.

I joke with my co workers that if I get assigned something I don't want to do, I'll just quit.

We have a large bucket list I have added to for years. We love to travel and my wife and I have many individual hobbies and those we share. I just returned from a 5200 mile, 2 week cross country solo motorcycle ride on my Gold Wing.

I can't wait to retire. I mostly still love my work and I am good at it. I am a full stack Java web developer. I have developed a reputation of being able to take a large complicated business problem, analyze it, and design/develop a quality software solution. I am given a lot of freedom to just get it done. I love it and will miss that thrill. But I think I will be fine.

I can't wait. Also I have worked from home non stop since Mar 9, 2020. I can't imagine ever going to an office again.

In fact, I told my manager that if they tried to make me.... I would just quit <grin>

Bobby
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by HomerJ »

JoeRetire wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:26 am
KlangFool wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:16 amIt is just a job. You are paid to do it. There is nothing more or less to it.
For most people, there is more to work than just getting paid.
Not most people.

And someday, old Joe, you're going to leave your job and find out that, fairly quickly, you'll be completely forgotten.
Last edited by HomerJ on Thu Apr 22, 2021 7:45 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by HomerJ »

Wannaretireearly wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 6:27 am
SQRT wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 3:29 am
HanSolo wrote: Wed Apr 21, 2021 11:29 pm

The Atlantic ran a piece that illustrates the problem of loss of relevance, and why that might be even harder for people coming out of more prominent positions. It offers ideas on how to make the transition to a different phase of life, so that it doesn't wind up seeming empty.
https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/ar ... ne/590650/
Very useful, interesting article. Thanks for posting. I can especially identify with the goal of developing and maintaining social connections. My spouse and I make a conscious effort to keep contact with our friends. Many of these are friends we have developed since retirement through themed travel, volunteering, or other normal connections (hairstylist, masseur, etc). One potential risk of retirement, or getting older in general, is social isolation.
+1 very good article. Makes me want to plan now for post retirement activities that are eulogy, not resume, building!
Agreed... I did like that part of the article... Eulogy, not resume building.
A Goldman Sachs associate provided a variety of detailed explanations, but then offered a caveat, “If I’m being dead-### honest, though, nobody knows what’s really going on.”
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My Regrets after Retiring?

Post by Bogle7 »

None
Zip
Nada
Old fart who does three index funds, baby.
SteadyOne
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by SteadyOne »

bligh wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 4:15 pm
surfstar wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 9:25 am
JoeRetire wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:26 am
KlangFool wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:16 amIt is just a job. You are paid to do it. There is nothing more or less to it.
For most people, there is more to work than just getting paid.
No. I think you have it backwards. For some people.
+1.

I believe JoeRetire is thinking of more self actualized and higher paid positions. Positions, where people have some ability to dictate and control their work environment, or else find themselves another position that does. It is how people mention Warren Buffet hasn't retired and continues to work in his old age.. Why wouldn't he want to continue to work? He has no boss to report to, and complete control over who he works with, what he works on and how much he works on it.

The vast majority of the people are not in that situation.
Exactly. most people don’t have exciting careers they have jobs and boring ones.In the last 10 years or so before retirement you basically stuck because you have to persevere to get paid and may be get some pension benefits. Nobody will hire you at this age somewhere else. So most people are miserable.

Number of people who are really highly paid — captains of industry types or creative types who enjoy what they are doing is so small it’s almost insignificant. If you are one of them, you won the lottery and you do not have to retire at all. Unless it’s a medical reason. Well at some point we all leave our jobs. My preference is while I am still able to walk on my own and compose whole sentences.
“Every de­duc­tion is al­lowed as a mat­ter of leg­isla­tive grace.” US Federal Court
gips
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by gips »

I found my mind becoming progressively less sharp despite a number of intellectual endeavors. So I taught myself cloud computing and now consult to a faang 2.5 days a week, 6 months a year. It's been challenging, lucrative, I get to choose my projects and work with smart people. rn, working on machine learning/ai project, incredible fun.

I also have a problem with money...more precisely, an irrational fear of exhausting our retirement account. I suppose it's tied to my grandfather running out of money due to health issues. Now, with good semi-retirement income, I rarely give it a second thought.
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by av111 »

SQRT wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 7:17 pm
av111 wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 6:29 pm
+1 Eulogy building.. that's a sobering goal!
Yes, that thought occurred to me as well. But I think the point is a good one. The kinds of things that people mention in a Eulogy are not things the subject gets to say, only his loved ones do. In the end that’s all we got, what our loved ones thought of us. I don’t think there is anything wrong with thinking that way while we are still alive. Do you?
I like the way you think. It is a very good way to decide what to do in the next phase of the life. I struggle with caring about what people think of me after I am done
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by cheese_breath »

av111 wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 6:29 pm +1 Eulogy building.. that's a sobering goal!
But a valuable one. A few weeks into the nursing home lockdown I began thinking I should develop a eulogy for DW in case she didn't make it. I had the whole funeral planned out, including the music before she passed on. I spent three years with her including staying overnight from the time of her stroke until the lockdown forced me out. Here's the song I had played after I finished delivering the eulogy in remembrance of those times together. I deleted the opening narrative (one minute and ten seconds). Just listen to the music.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2NqHfw3RRnI

I'm so glad I had it all prepared before it was needed rather than throwing something together at the last minute.

(Sorry for hijacking the thread, but I just had to share this.)
The surest way to know the future is when it becomes the past.
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by beyou »

Thegame14 wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 5:14 pm so those people who got purpose maybe were part of that looooooooooong lost world, most of us work for 7 plus companies in our life, get laid of at the drop of a hat due to a recession or a startup goes under, and we have absolute ZERO care for a company and get ZERO satisfaction bouncing around seeing countless CFO after Greedy horrible boss CFO ruin company after company by chasing double digit growth due to some stock bonus, and ruining the company along the way.....
+1

Every job I had, came into a bad or mediocre situation, fixed it, and later had management dismantle what I did to make a quick buck. Lost all pride in the outcome, but you need to enjoy the process to avoid totally hating your everyday existence at work. I just hated some of the days.
av111
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by av111 »

cheese_breath wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 10:49 pm
av111 wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 6:29 pm +1 Eulogy building.. that's a sobering goal!
But a valuable one. A few weeks into the nursing home lockdown I began thinking I should develop a eulogy for DW in case she didn't make it. I had the whole funeral planned out, including the music before she passed on. I spent three years with her including staying overnight from the time of her stroke until the lockdown forced me out. Here's the song I had played after I finished delivering the eulogy in remembrance of those times together. I deleted the opening narrative (one minute and ten seconds). Just listen to the music.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2NqHfw3RRnI

I'm so glad I had it all prepared before it was needed rather than throwing something together at the last minute.

(Sorry for hijacking the thread, but I just had to share this.)
It is really sweet. Hope it helped
AV111
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by sid hartha »

JoeRetire wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:26 am
KlangFool wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:16 amIt is just a job. You are paid to do it. There is nothing more or less to it.
For most people, there is more to work than just getting paid.
That's not really my experience at the moment. Almost all of my friends and my wife's friends hate their jobs but they continue to do it because the money is good. A lot of the time what they really hate and what is making them miserable is their manager and not the job per se, but they still hate going to work and it really is just about getting paid at the end of the day. When get together I usually just keep quiet when they start complaining about work and their boss because I actually really like my job and my boss and find meaning in the work I do. I guess maybe if I had a larger sample size there would be more people like me or even more people in between hating and loving their jobs. But for whatever reason that's not been my experience.
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by Ramjet »

JoeRetire wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:26 am
KlangFool wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:16 amIt is just a job. You are paid to do it. There is nothing more or less to it.
For most some people, there is more to work than just getting paid.
Fixed it for you, cause it certainly isn't most people
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by JoeRetire »

Keenobserver wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 4:17 pm
JoeRetire wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:26 am
KlangFool wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:16 amIt is just a job. You are paid to do it. There is nothing more or less to it.
For most people, there is more to work than just getting paid.
I would disagree with this. Most of humanity works because the absolutly have to, not because that is where they find their
" meaning."
That's fair. I was referring only to the US, not the rest of humanity.
There are more things to do in life than be a corporate slave. Most people will never been seen at work again if they could help it.
In the US at least, people aren't slaves.
Last edited by JoeRetire on Fri Apr 23, 2021 6:30 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by JoeRetire »

HomerJ wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 7:43 pm
JoeRetire wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:26 am
KlangFool wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:16 amIt is just a job. You are paid to do it. There is nothing more or less to it.
For most people, there is more to work than just getting paid.
Not most people.

And someday, old Joe, you're going to leave your job and find out that, fairly quickly, you'll be completely forgotten.
I left my job over 5 years ago, young Homer.
And while I haven't yet been forgotten, that has never concerned me.

Speaking from personal experience, it's quite possible to enjoy your job and also to enjoy your retirement.
It's the end of the world as we know it. | It's the end of the world as we know it. | It's the end of the world as we know it. | And I feel fine.
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JoeRetire
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by JoeRetire »

sid hartha wrote: Fri Apr 23, 2021 5:24 am
JoeRetire wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:26 am
KlangFool wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:16 amIt is just a job. You are paid to do it. There is nothing more or less to it.
For most people, there is more to work than just getting paid.
That's not really my experience at the moment. Almost all of my friends and my wife's friends hate their jobs but they continue to do it because the money is good. A lot of the time what they really hate and what is making them miserable is their manager and not the job per se, but they still hate going to work and it really is just about getting paid at the end of the day.
I feel bad for you and your friends. The most common reason people leave their jobs is due to their manager.
Why don't you leave yours and find a manager you like to work with?
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vested1
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by vested1 »

SQRT wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 7:17 pm
av111 wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 6:29 pm
+1 Eulogy building.. that's a sobering goal!
Yes, that thought occurred to me as well. But I think the point is a good one. The kinds of things that people mention in a Eulogy are not things the subject gets to say, only his loved ones do. In the end that’s all we got, what our loved ones thought of us. I don’t think there is anything wrong with thinking that way while we are still alive. Do you?
Not quite all. What we think of ourselves is equally important. Unfortunately the two are not always, or maybe even rarely, the same. I'll love my loved ones regardless of what they do, and hopefully they'll return the favor. That's entirely up to them however, and as far as my eulogy goes, that will be for their benefit because I won't be able to hear it.
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by sid hartha »

JoeRetire wrote: Fri Apr 23, 2021 6:21 am
sid hartha wrote: Fri Apr 23, 2021 5:24 am
JoeRetire wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:26 am
KlangFool wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:16 amIt is just a job. You are paid to do it. There is nothing more or less to it.
For most people, there is more to work than just getting paid.
That's not really my experience at the moment. Almost all of my friends and my wife's friends hate their jobs but they continue to do it because the money is good. A lot of the time what they really hate and what is making them miserable is their manager and not the job per se, but they still hate going to work and it really is just about getting paid at the end of the day.
I feel bad for you and your friends. The most common reason people leave their jobs is due to their manager.
Why don't you leave yours and find a manager you like to work with?
Hah no need to feel bad for me, you either misread my post or maybe only read part of it. I was talking about other people not me. After that part you quoted I go on to say:

"When we get together I usually just keep quiet when they start complaining about work and their boss because I actually really like my job and my boss and find meaning in the work I do"

Thing is I sometimes feel guilty that I like my job and that it gives me a sense of purpose in life and don't want to rub in people's faces. Others in my circle don't seem to have that experience and I do feel bad for them. But at the same time it's a choice they have made so I stay out of it unless specifically asked.
Last edited by sid hartha on Fri Apr 23, 2021 7:07 am, edited 7 times in total.
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by dziuniek »

JoeRetire wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:26 am
KlangFool wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:16 amIt is just a job. You are paid to do it. There is nothing more or less to it.
For most people, there is more to work than just getting paid.
Oh I don't know, maybe it's the other way around for most people.
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by dcabler »

Thegame14 wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 9:10 am
KlangFool wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:16 am OP,

The answer: none.

I did excellent work and achieved extra-ordinary result. To reward my effort, my location was off-shored and I was laid off. This happened to me many times. I was unemployed for more than 1 year many times.

My identity is not tied to my job. My actual job performance has nothing to do with whether I will be rewarded. The mega corp has their strategic directions. If you do not fit their views and profiles, you will be gone.

It is just a job. You are paid to do it. There is nothing more or less to it. The world would keep on going with or without you.

KlangFool
+1 I feel exactly the same and also was laid off 2-3 times due to a company off shoring or going out of business.
Similar here. And while I really prefer that work itself is interesting and that I get along with my colleagues and even make friends with them in some cases, to me work is more about enabling the other 2/3rds of my day, and soon to be 100% of my day within the next couple of years...
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JoeRetire
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by JoeRetire »

sid hartha wrote: Fri Apr 23, 2021 6:56 am
JoeRetire wrote: Fri Apr 23, 2021 6:21 am
sid hartha wrote: Fri Apr 23, 2021 5:24 am
JoeRetire wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:26 am
KlangFool wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:16 amIt is just a job. You are paid to do it. There is nothing more or less to it.
For most people, there is more to work than just getting paid.
That's not really my experience at the moment. Almost all of my friends and my wife's friends hate their jobs but they continue to do it because the money is good. A lot of the time what they really hate and what is making them miserable is their manager and not the job per se, but they still hate going to work and it really is just about getting paid at the end of the day.
I feel bad for you and your friends. The most common reason people leave their jobs is due to their manager.
Why don't you leave yours and find a manager you like to work with?
Hah no need to feel bad for me, you either misread my post or maybe only read part of it. I was talking about other people not me. After that part you quoted I go on to say:

"When we get together I usually just keep quiet when they start complaining about work and their boss because I actually really like my job and my boss and find meaning in the work I do"
Sorry, I did indeed miss that part.
I feel happy for you, sorry for your friends.
Thing is I sometimes feel guilty that I like my job and that it gives me a sense of purpose in life and don't want to rub in people's faces. Others in my circle don't seem to have that experience and I do feel bad for them. But at the same time it's a choice they have made so I stay out of it unless specifically asked.
I have found that whining about work is a "thing" with some groups. For a few, it seems to be real. For others, I know that it's not all that bad for them. I also remain quiet when I see that happening.
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by MikeG62 »

OP, it's a transition from many perspectives. You need to be sure you are ready financially, emotionally, socially, etc...

The biggest one for us was transitioning from having a large paycheck and saving a significant amount of money every year to living off those savings/investments. However, once you do it for several months you get used to it (fairly quickly).

I early retired 5+ years ago at 53 (DW was a SAHM so essentially retired as well). No pension or income from any sources other than our investments. It's worked out just fine. I never, ever think about work or what I would be doing if I were still working. It's almost like it was in a prior life. Zero (less than zero if possible) interest in working again. I'd say that was the biggest surprise.

I hope you have the same experience as we have had.
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by Keenobserver »

JoeRetire wrote: Fri Apr 23, 2021 6:16 am
Keenobserver wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 4:17 pm
JoeRetire wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:26 am
KlangFool wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:16 amIt is just a job. You are paid to do it. There is nothing more or less to it.
For most people, there is more to work than just getting paid.
I would disagree with this. Most of humanity works because the absolutly have to, not because that is where they find their
" meaning."
That's fair. I was referring only to the US, not the rest of humanity.
There are more things to do in life than be a corporate slave. Most people will never been seen at work again if they could help it.
In the US at least, people aren't slaves.
I would respectfully argue that most folks in the US also work because they have, not because work makes their lives worth living. Most people in US would also not show up for work and do something else if they could help it. People you speak of exist, but only as a very small % of work force. Especially, the younger crowd, I would say 99% would not show up if they got paid whether they showed up or not.
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by spammagnet »

I suspect that responses to this thread are skewed toward professional and white-collar jobs. If correct, those in non-professional and other non-white-collar employment (yes, the latter can be professionals in their industry) may have a very different view as to whether it's a "job" or a "career".

But we're getting off the point of the OP. What did you regret about retiring, if anything?
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by changingtimes »

bdaniel58 wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 7:42 pm ...
I joke with my co workers that if I get assigned something I don't want to do, I'll just quit.
...
In fact, I told my manager that if they tried to make me.... I would just quit <grin>

Bobby
I have never said this out loud to any coworkers or bosses, but I know they know that I am pretty much still there because I get to do my own thing and feather my own nest, and that if that changes, I'm out of there. And they still like having me around. (in fact I took advantage of the pandemic to build a project that has been a massive driver of interest in our products. So I reminded them how nice I am to have around :) )

I was already working at home two days a week before the pandemic, but this full-time working from home is pretty much my dream. I might go back one day a week, or a couple days a week as long as I am not having to be there 8 hours, chained to my desk. And if I can swing that, which probably then leads into being able to work from other places around the country, I'm not exactly sure why I would "retire." But it's nice to know I can pull the trigger whenever I feel like it.
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by daacrusher2001 »

Great thread...

I just turned 62 and I was planning to retire sometime this year. I've been hoping for a package to encourage me to leave. That said, I'm not gonna hang on indefinitely for a few more bucks.

Like the OP, I've probably been working steadily since my early teens. It's good to see how many are just flat out enjoying retirement.

I admit, I'm nervous about it - I'm in good shape financially, so it's not so much about the money. I'm worried I'll miss the daily interaction with my team. I've been working from home full time since March 2020 - I love not commuting. In my area, commutes can be really tedious and long.

On the flip side, it appeals to me to be able to do things like...go golf, fish, bike, hike, play guitar, etc...whenever I want to.
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by Thegame14 »

dcabler wrote: Fri Apr 23, 2021 7:07 am
Thegame14 wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 9:10 am
KlangFool wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:16 am OP,

The answer: none.

I did excellent work and achieved extra-ordinary result. To reward my effort, my location was off-shored and I was laid off. This happened to me many times. I was unemployed for more than 1 year many times.

My identity is not tied to my job. My actual job performance has nothing to do with whether I will be rewarded. The mega corp has their strategic directions. If you do not fit their views and profiles, you will be gone.

It is just a job. You are paid to do it. There is nothing more or less to it. The world would keep on going with or without you.

KlangFool
+1 I feel exactly the same and also was laid off 2-3 times due to a company off shoring or going out of business.
Similar here. And while I really prefer that work itself is interesting and that I get along with my colleagues and even make friends with them in some cases, to me work is more about enabling the other 2/3rds of my day, and soon to be 100% of my day within the next couple of years...
Exactly, work is nothing more than what you do from 9-5 to pay for what you want to do the rest of the time.... If your self identity or self value is tied to a job, you have some kind of Type A personality problem... especially if it comes from your title at work, I dont care if you are Executive Vice president or president pooper scooper, title means nothing.....
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by SQRT »

Thegame14 wrote: Fri Apr 23, 2021 9:50 am
dcabler wrote: Fri Apr 23, 2021 7:07 am
Thegame14 wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 9:10 am
KlangFool wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:16 am OP,

The answer: none.

I did excellent work and achieved extra-ordinary result. To reward my effort, my location was off-shored and I was laid off. This happened to me many times. I was unemployed for more than 1 year many times.

My identity is not tied to my job. My actual job performance has nothing to do with whether I will be rewarded. The mega corp has their strategic directions. If you do not fit their views and profiles, you will be gone.

It is just a job. You are paid to do it. There is nothing more or less to it. The world would keep on going with or without you.

KlangFool
+1 I feel exactly the same and also was laid off 2-3 times due to a company off shoring or going out of business.
Similar here. And while I really prefer that work itself is interesting and that I get along with my colleagues and even make friends with them in some cases, to me work is more about enabling the other 2/3rds of my day, and soon to be 100% of my day within the next couple of years...
Exactly, work is nothing more than what you do from 9-5 to pay for what you want to do the rest of the time.... If your self identity or self value is tied to a job, you have some kind of Type A personality problem... especially if it comes from your title at work, I dont care if you are Executive Vice president or president pooper scooper, title means nothing.....
Right, but for many such people (myself included) the monetary rewards are significant and well worth the so called “problem”.
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by EnjoyIt »

bligh wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 6:25 pm
flyingaway wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 5:28 pm
bligh wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 4:15 pm
surfstar wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 9:25 am
JoeRetire wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:26 am

For most people, there is more to work than just getting paid.
No. I think you have it backwards. For some people.
+1.

I believe JoeRetire is thinking of more self actualized and higher paid positions. Positions, where people have some ability to dictate and control their work environment, or else find themselves another position that does. It is how people mention Warren Buffet hasn't retired and continues to work in his old age.. Why wouldn't he want to continue to work? He has no boss to report to, and complete control over who he works with, what he works on and how much he works on it.

The vast majority of the people are not in that situation.
Maybe Buffet does not like travel, fish, play with grandkids, eat at Bangkok night markets, etc. But that is OK.
The point is that it is easy to keep working when you are able to travel, fish, play with the grand kids, eat at bangkok night markets and so on, when you feel like you want to. There is literally no one there to tell him he cannot. He doesn't have to ask for time off. He doesn't have to get it approved, he doesn't have to have his boss tell him he cannot take that much time off in one go. He doesn't have someone telling him they need him to go ahead and come in this weekend. He doesn't have a boss period. He is working for himself. It is easy to keep working into your 90s in that type of situation.

Don't feel like working today? No problem. Call your secretary, and delegate the work you were going to do to someone else or just do it later.
Need a vacation? Send out an email and let people know you will be gone.
Feel burnt out? Go to some fancy retreat out in the Maldives to meditate
Don't like this one client you are working with? Fire them.
This project is getting boring? Give it to someone else to work on.

This isn't a black or white state, for each job/role in the workforce there is a continuum from "no control whatsoever" to "complete control in all aspects". We all sit somewhere on this curve. As a rule of thumb - The lower your pay, the more easily it is done by someone else, the fewer your options, the more financially insecure your position.. the lower you sit on this curve. The higher your pay, the more in demand your skills are, the more options you have and the more financially secure your position.. the higher you sit on this curve. At the tippy top end you have the financially independent and self employed.
I don’t think you understand just how time intensive it is to run a massive business like Berkshire. Everyone and I mean everyone I know who runs a very large business is always working. And I mean always. They are constantly on the phone or on their computer shooting off emails. It is a 24/7 job. Some people love that life, some people don’t. I think most people just follow societal norms and go to work because that is normal. That is what is expected of them.
A time to EVALUATE your jitters: | https://www.bogleheads.org/forum/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=79939&start=400#p5275418
EnjoyIt
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by EnjoyIt »

JoeRetire wrote: Fri Apr 23, 2021 6:16 am
Keenobserver wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 4:17 pm
JoeRetire wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:26 am
KlangFool wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:16 amIt is just a job. You are paid to do it. There is nothing more or less to it.
For most people, there is more to work than just getting paid.
I would disagree with this. Most of humanity works because the absolutly have to, not because that is where they find their
" meaning."
That's fair. I was referring only to the US, not the rest of humanity.
There are more things to do in life than be a corporate slave. Most people will never been seen at work again if they could help it.
In the US at least, people aren't slaves.
People aren’t slaves in the traditional sense of the word, but I beg to differ. In the US people are slaves to consumerism. They buy buy buy and must work work work to try and cover what they buy. Their debt is their shackles.
A time to EVALUATE your jitters: | https://www.bogleheads.org/forum/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=79939&start=400#p5275418
Somethingwitty92912
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by Somethingwitty92912 »

JoeRetire wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:23 am
Thegame14 wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:14 am I know I am a different generation

retirement to me is just economics of how much money you need to live without working and how much you plan to leave to your kids/grandkids. Id be quite happy just sleeping late, watching TV, going for a walk, playing video games, running errands, and small hobbies, and not having to be on anyone else's schedule. to me retirement is FREEDOM!!!!
Yup, seems like a different generation.
Which generation is that? An which generation are you joe?
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by dcabler »

SQRT wrote: Fri Apr 23, 2021 10:09 am
Thegame14 wrote: Fri Apr 23, 2021 9:50 am
dcabler wrote: Fri Apr 23, 2021 7:07 am
Thegame14 wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 9:10 am
KlangFool wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:16 am OP,

The answer: none.

I did excellent work and achieved extra-ordinary result. To reward my effort, my location was off-shored and I was laid off. This happened to me many times. I was unemployed for more than 1 year many times.

My identity is not tied to my job. My actual job performance has nothing to do with whether I will be rewarded. The mega corp has their strategic directions. If you do not fit their views and profiles, you will be gone.

It is just a job. You are paid to do it. There is nothing more or less to it. The world would keep on going with or without you.

KlangFool
+1 I feel exactly the same and also was laid off 2-3 times due to a company off shoring or going out of business.
Similar here. And while I really prefer that work itself is interesting and that I get along with my colleagues and even make friends with them in some cases, to me work is more about enabling the other 2/3rds of my day, and soon to be 100% of my day within the next couple of years...
Exactly, work is nothing more than what you do from 9-5 to pay for what you want to do the rest of the time.... If your self identity or self value is tied to a job, you have some kind of Type A personality problem... especially if it comes from your title at work, I dont care if you are Executive Vice president or president pooper scooper, title means nothing.....
Right, but for many such people (myself included) the monetary rewards are significant and well worth the so called “problem”.
For me it's only been a problem when I'm paid well but miserable at work. It wasn't worth it, but it did get rectified in every case, thank goodness. And always for the better, financially, even when it wasn't voluntary.
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JoeRetire
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by JoeRetire »

Keenobserver wrote: Fri Apr 23, 2021 8:39 am
JoeRetire wrote: Fri Apr 23, 2021 6:16 am
Keenobserver wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 4:17 pm
JoeRetire wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:26 am
KlangFool wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:16 amIt is just a job. You are paid to do it. There is nothing more or less to it.
For most people, there is more to work than just getting paid.
I would disagree with this. Most of humanity works because the absolutly have to, not because that is where they find their
" meaning."
That's fair. I was referring only to the US, not the rest of humanity.
There are more things to do in life than be a corporate slave. Most people will never been seen at work again if they could help it.
In the US at least, people aren't slaves.
I would respectfully argue that most folks in the US also work because they have, not because work makes their lives worth living.
Of course that's a different question. As far as I can tell, nobody mentioned "makes their lives worth living." I know I didn't.

Would you argue that most folks don't get anything more out of work than simply a paycheck? If so, the surveys suggest otherwise.
Most people in US would also not show up for work and do something else if they could help it. People you speak of exist, but only as a very small % of work force. Especially, the younger crowd, I would say 99% would not show up if they got paid whether they showed up or not.
I can't speak for 99% of the younger crowd, and I'm guessing you can't either. But I suspect you are incorrect. Perhaps we know a different crowd of younger folks.
Last edited by JoeRetire on Fri Apr 23, 2021 12:02 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by JoeRetire »

EnjoyIt wrote: Fri Apr 23, 2021 10:24 amIn the US people are slaves to consumerism. They buy buy buy and must work work work to try and cover what they buy. Their debt is their shackles.
Sure. Some are.
Last edited by JoeRetire on Fri Apr 23, 2021 12:01 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: What Were Your Regrets after Retiring? (serious question)

Post by JoeRetire »

Somethingwitty92912 wrote: Fri Apr 23, 2021 10:32 am
JoeRetire wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:23 am
Thegame14 wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 8:14 am I know I am a different generation

retirement to me is just economics of how much money you need to live without working and how much you plan to leave to your kids/grandkids. Id be quite happy just sleeping late, watching TV, going for a walk, playing video games, running errands, and small hobbies, and not having to be on anyone else's schedule. to me retirement is FREEDOM!!!!
Yup, seems like a different generation.
Which generation is that?
Apparently, it's an entire generation that is happy if they only sleep late, watch tv, play video games, run errands and small hobbies.
An which generation are you joe?
Apparently not that one. That doesn't sound like an enjoyable retirement to me.
Last edited by JoeRetire on Fri Apr 23, 2021 11:52 am, edited 1 time in total.
It's the end of the world as we know it. | It's the end of the world as we know it. | It's the end of the world as we know it. | And I feel fine.
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