Puppy training recommendations when living alone

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S4C5
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Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by S4C5 »

I just got a minature dachshund puppy. He is 8 weeks. I was on the fence since my gf left and now it's just me but I went ahead and got him anyway since I already paid 50% deposit.

Problems; I live in a 3rd floor apartment, I work 8-5, it's winter, and he doesn't have all his shots. I can't take him outside every 2-3 hours to pee as the guides say. it is simply not possible.

I think using pee pads and letting the dog relieve itself inside is nasty, but I'm in a bit of a bind. I put him on the pad, but he goes to the carpet anyway. My only other option is using the balcony, which I am going to try using a pad outdoors to teach him to go to the door.

The bigger problem is what to do during the day. I can't keep him in his cage for 9 hours. He does good in the cage at night, but wakes me up once to pee, so no way he can last that long in the cage. So I put him in the bathroom, with his food and water, leave the cage open, and leave a pee pad in the corner. He's usually managed to lock himself out of the cage, soiled the pad and the floor by the time I get home.

I don't have any friends or neighbors I know well enough here to help, and I live alone (whole reason I got the dog in the first place). No family. I am not comfortable paying a stranger off the internet to come daily into my home to deal with him.

He is adorable, but I am considering cutting my losses and returning him to the breeder. I will hopefully be buying a house by summer, but I'm still going to have the work situation and it might get worse with even longer hours. Depressing situation. Anybody who has raised a puppy alone while working, how did you do it?
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JoeRetire
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by JoeRetire »

S4C5 wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 1:34 pm He is adorable, but I am considering cutting my losses and returning him to the breeder.
Given all the problems you pose, that seems to be best for both you and the puppy. Breeders I know would not have given you their puppy in the first place with all those limitations.

Perhaps when your situation changes, you can try again then.
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quantAndHold
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by quantAndHold »

You’re really only talking about a few weeks before he’s both had his shots, and is old enough to be able to hold it all day while you’re working. If you’re working from home, can you just suck it up and use your breaks and lunchtime to take him out?

Otherwise, there are dog walkers and dog sitters that you can hire to do this. For the few weeks until he’s had his shots, you need a sitter that won’t bring another dog over. Once he’s had his shots, a dog walker that walks multiple dogs would be fine.

Once he’s had his shots, doggie daycare is an option, too.
Longdog
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by Longdog »

JoeRetire wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 1:58 pm
S4C5 wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 1:34 pm He is adorable, but I am considering cutting my losses and returning him to the breeder.
Given all the problems you pose, that seems to be best for both you and the puppy. Breeders I know would not have given you their puppy in the first place with all those limitations.

Perhaps when your situation changes, you can try again then.
Agreed. It does not seem that your current living situation and lifestyle are amenable to having a puppy. Neither of you will be happy.
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onourway
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by onourway »

You can't have a dog in a crate all night, out for a short break in the morning, then back home alone in a crate all day long - even if they could hold it. You will need to either find a daycare option for him, have someone come exercise him for you at least once during the day, or more likely, admit that your lifestyle isn't compatible with a dog at this time.
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S4C5
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by S4C5 »

quantAndHold wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 2:02 pm
If you’re working from home, can you just suck it up and use your breaks and lunchtime to take him out?
I am not working from home and cannot come back during the day. I either need some sort of self-contained solution when he's gone or else I'm going to have to give him up. I only work 4 days a week, but still. I'm not sure how long to keep trying this. It's been less than a week so far.
shess
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by shess »

Something to keep in mind is that while a dog can help you with loneliness, you have to way wary of the costs you are imposing on the dog. You may spend the rest of the dog's life dealing with the consequences of those costs. We adopted a dog from a rescue situation, our understanding was that he was not overtly ill-treated (no physical abuse), but they didn't have time for him (he was crated or kennelled for much of the day, and not well socialized). We've had him for 9 years, and unfortunately many of the issues setup in his first six months are still with him, and they seriously degrade his quality of life. It's also hard on us, for instance we might meet a dog while walking, but I cannot get in and pet the happy new dog, because my dog will get jealous - but my dog doesn't much enjoy physical contact himself.
Barsoom
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by Barsoom »

I was in a similar situation with an adopted mini dachshund while living in a second floor condo.

We litter-box trained our dog and used pellet-style dog litter. We put the pee pads around the litter box to catch any spillage, as our doxie got used to putting his front legs only in the box unless doing #2.

-B
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S4C5
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by S4C5 »

Barsoom wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 2:26 pm I was in a similar situation with an adopted mini dachshund while living in a second floor condo.

We litter-box trained our dog and used pellet-style dog litter. We put the pee pads around the litter box to catch any spillage, as our doxie got used to putting his front legs only in the box unless doing #2.

-B
Thanks. Can you comment on the temperament of these dogs? I will basically be the only human in his life. Will he be content in such a situation or will I be torturing the poor creature. I know some breeds would be a disaster in this situation. I was hoping he might work, but maybe not.
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quantAndHold
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by quantAndHold »

S4C5 wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 2:08 pm
quantAndHold wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 2:02 pm
If you’re working from home, can you just suck it up and use your breaks and lunchtime to take him out?
I am not working from home and cannot come back during the day. I either need some sort of self-contained solution when he's gone or else I'm going to have to give him up. I only work 4 days a week, but still. I'm not sure how long to keep trying this. It's been less than a week so far.
If you’re not willing to hire someone to come in, at least for awhile, I’m afraid your options are pretty limited.
truenorth418
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by truenorth418 »

You are wise to return the dog. There are way too many who adopted dogs during the pandemic who are now ill-suited to care for them. This is not fair to the owner, the neighbors, the community and importantly the dog itself which would benefit from a full time owner with the time to care for it, train it, etc.
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retiredjg
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by retiredjg »

There is nothing in your description of your life situation that indicates your home is suitable for raising a puppy or even homing most adult dogs. Just nothing. I'm sorry if that sounds harsh, but anything less than the truth is not fair to either you or the dog. :(

You will be miserable. The dog will be miserable. The dog will almost certainly develop problem behaviors. You will come to resent the dog and dread coming home. That is no way for either of you to live.

Do yourself and the dog both a favor and take it back to the breeder and no matter how much money you lose, consider it a lesson well and cheaply learned.
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S4C5
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by S4C5 »

retiredjg wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 2:56 pm Do yourself and the dog both a favor and take it back to the breeder and no matter how much money you lose, consider it a lesson well and cheaply learned.
I was about ready to eat the deposit but figured I would give it a try. I see so many other single people with much larger animals.
I fear you are right and that even the little dogs need someone around full-time.
Sucks. Thanks for the advice.
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calmaniac
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by calmaniac »

S4C5 wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 2:58 pm
retiredjg wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 2:56 pm Do yourself and the dog both a favor and take it back to the breeder and no matter how much money you lose, consider it a lesson well and cheaply learned.
I was about ready to eat the deposit but figured I would give it a try. I see so many other single people with much larger animals.
I fear you are right and that even the little dogs need someone around full-time.
Sucks. Thanks for the advice.
I think retiredjg's post is pretty wise.

A puppy is a huge responsibility and requires a lot of time, attention, and love. I could never have had a puppy when I was single and early in my career.
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by Longdog »

S4C5 wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 2:58 pm
retiredjg wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 2:56 pm Do yourself and the dog both a favor and take it back to the breeder and no matter how much money you lose, consider it a lesson well and cheaply learned.
I was about ready to eat the deposit but figured I would give it a try. I see so many other single people with much larger animals.
I fear you are right and that even the little dogs need someone around full-time.
Sucks. Thanks for the advice.
Dogs are extremely social animals, and what they experience in their earliest days really impacts them the rest of their life. Being isolated for long periods of time without any social interaction is not a recipe for a well-adjusted happy adult dog. Unfortunately, it does not seem that you are in a position to be able spend enough time with the puppy, so please give the puppy another chance by returning him to the breeder. Yes, it sucks. But unless you can arrange to have someone come in and spend time with him every day, or leave him in puppy daycare with other dogs and people, it is probably the best option at this point.
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by DoubleComma »

OP the simple fact you are asking these questions and thinking about the puppy leads me to believe that you will eventually be a great dog owner. However you seem to have arrived at the right answer, now is not the time to take on the responsibility of a dog.

If the breeder is reputable, I would think they would refund you deposit as last I heard there is still lots of demand for puppies. If not, whatever the deposit is that you will lose is small with what dog ownership will ultimately cost.
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by walkabout »

I agree with most who have responded. It sounds like you and the puppy (or any puppy for that matter) are not a good match at this time.

Having said that, if you want a dog in the future, I would strongly encourage you to get one from a shelter or rescue organization rather than from a breeder. There are more than enough adoptable dogs that are good animals and need a good home available from shelters and rescues that, in my opinion, there is rarely a good reason to go breeder route.

Having said all of that, you might also think about getting a cat (or two - so they will each have company) in the future. Generally they are much lower maintenance than dogs (in particular, they don’t need to be walked outside).

In either case (dog or cat), a quality rescue organization should be able to match you with an appropriate pet. The cat rescue organizations that I am familiar with in my area also advertise that they will take the cat(s) back in the future if you feel like you have to give it up.
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by Independent George »

DoubleComma wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 4:29 pm OP the simple fact you are asking these questions and thinking about the puppy leads me to believe that you will eventually be a great dog owner. However you seem to have arrived at the right answer, now is not the time to take on the responsibility of a dog.

If the breeder is reputable, I would think they would refund you deposit as last I heard there is still lots of demand for puppies. If not, whatever the deposit is that you will lose is small with what dog ownership will ultimately cost.
JoeRetire wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 1:58 pm Given all the problems you pose, that seems to be best for both you and the puppy. Breeders I know would not have given you their puppy in the first place with all those limitations.

Perhaps when your situation changes, you can try again then.
I think these two posts say everything that needs to be said. Dogs are wonderful, wonderful creatures, and I hope someday you are in a better situation that allows you to raise one, but they are enormous sink of time, money, and emotions. The best thing you can do for the both of you is bring him back to the breeder, and wait until you're ready before bringing a dog home. You won't have to wait forever, but this is not the time for you.
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by Sandtrap »

Longdog wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 2:04 pm
JoeRetire wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 1:58 pm
S4C5 wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 1:34 pm He is adorable, but I am considering cutting my losses and returning him to the breeder.
Given all the problems you pose, that seems to be best for both you and the puppy. Breeders I know would not have given you their puppy in the first place with all those limitations.

Perhaps when your situation changes, you can try again then.
Agreed. It does not seem that your current living situation and lifestyle are amenable to having a puppy. Neither of you will be happy.
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tev9876
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by tev9876 »

Dog daycare would be your only other option and a good one if you can afford it. It needs to be a place where the dogs are out playing with other dogs (and human staff) all day and not just locked up in cages. The dog will get proper socialization with other animals and humans, and come home dead tired. Even if you could work from home I would still recommend it a couple days a week for the socialization factor. The shot thing may not be an issue - I think mine only required the first round of shots. They can keep the puppies segregated as needed. Good day cares also require vaccination, flea preventive, temperament testing, etc. from all of their guests so the chance of fights or communicable disease among their guests is much lower than on the street or at the dog park.

I live alone and have two dogs, both of which I got as eight week old puppies. Having a second older dog to teach the puppy was a huge help, but I don't recommend that for the OP - that is where daycare can come in. I only work a few miles from home so leaving at lunch was not a big deal for the first puppy, but I still got her in as soon as possible a day or two a week to socialize. The second came along a couple days before Covid lockdown so I ended up working from home much of his first 18 months. Since OP doesn't have this option, this is where daycare comes in (at a price).

The place I use charges $28/day for one dog in daycare. They do offer discounts for prepaying. It is nothing fancy - actually an industrial building they converted with kennels (mainly for overnight stays) and various pens to be able to group the dogs by size/personality. It is not one of the "resort" type places with live TV cameras so you can watch, memory foam pet beds, etc. - but the dogs are too busy sniffing each other all day to care about that stuff. I mainly use them for overnight boarding when I travel, but even after a single day there they will sleep for a couple days. Once the dog is older and can hold it longer during the day you could probably drop down to a couple days a week since the exhaustion can carry over to a second day.

Give it a try if you can afford it. If not going back to the breeder would be the best option and any reputable breeder should take a puppy back.
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by Katietsu »

S4C5 wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 2:58 pm
retiredjg wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 2:56 pm Do yourself and the dog both a favor and take it back to the breeder and no matter how much money you lose, consider it a lesson well and cheaply learned.
I was about ready to eat the deposit but figured I would give it a try. I see so many other single people with much larger animals.
I fear you are right and that even the little dogs need someone around full-time.
Sucks. Thanks for the advice.
This post tells me you need to do more education before you own a dog. For instance, little dogs have little bladders and need to pee significantly more often than bigger breeds, especially as puppies.

I believe that single people with your schedule can own a dog. But an 8 week old mini Dachshund is not the right dog and your current lifestyle parameters might not be consistent with dog ownership right now.
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by blueberrypi »

I grew up with a mini dachshund. He was (still is) the best dachshund ever but getting to that point took a tremendous amount of work. They have sooo much energy to burn and need exercise and training every day.
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S4C5
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by S4C5 »

DoubleComma wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 4:29 pm OP the simple fact you are asking these questions and thinking about the puppy leads me to believe that you will eventually be a great dog owner. However you seem to have arrived at the right answer, now is not the time to take on the responsibility of a dog.

If the breeder is reputable, I would think they would refund you deposit as last I heard there is still lots of demand for puppies. If not, whatever the deposit is that you will lose is small with what dog ownership will ultimately cost.
The deposit was $500, and the payment when I accepted him was $1000. So, $1500. I would feel ashamed for asking for any of it back.
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by khangaroo »

S4C5 wrote: Wed Jan 19, 2022 9:39 am
DoubleComma wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 4:29 pm OP the simple fact you are asking these questions and thinking about the puppy leads me to believe that you will eventually be a great dog owner. However you seem to have arrived at the right answer, now is not the time to take on the responsibility of a dog.

If the breeder is reputable, I would think they would refund you deposit as last I heard there is still lots of demand for puppies. If not, whatever the deposit is that you will lose is small with what dog ownership will ultimately cost.
The deposit was $500, and the payment when I accepted him was $1000. So, $1500. I would feel ashamed for asking for any of it back.
Usually a reputable breeder will have a first right of refusal meaning if the dog doesn’t work out then they have the first option to take back the dog vs. giving it away to someone else. I wouldn’t feel bad about at least asking for some of your money back; your situation is completely different than when you put in that deposit.

I agree with others that you should return the dog. It’s not a great life for a puppy who has to live alone for such a long period of time and at a young age as well. I might have some recency bias as I just finished Inside of a Dog by Alexandra Horowitz that talks a lot about their cognitive and social capabilities. They do get affected by their upbringing and this could be detrimental for future development.

On the flip side, I’m sure there have been many dogs who grew up this way but why do that when you can avoid it? You will have plenty of other times to get a dog in your life - don’t add this extra stress on the dog’s life and your own.
Barsoom
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by Barsoom »

S4C5 wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 2:38 pm
Barsoom wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 2:26 pm I was in a similar situation with an adopted mini dachshund while living in a second floor condo.

We litter-box trained our dog and used pellet-style dog litter. We put the pee pads around the litter box to catch any spillage, as our doxie got used to putting his front legs only in the box unless doing #2.

-B
Thanks. Can you comment on the temperament of these dogs? I will basically be the only human in his life. Will he be content in such a situation or will I be torturing the poor creature. I know some breeds would be a disaster in this situation. I was hoping he might work, but maybe not.
I've had two over the years, one at a time, both males and neutered. It's been just me, DW, and the dog.

Our first dog was a house dog who hated to go outside. He was good with children, though, and always let them pet him. Children flock to dachshunds because of their unusual shape and size. Our second dog was much more outgoing, an outdoors dog who rejected the litterbox, so we had to walk him regularly. He's also good with children.

Socializing is important for all dogs. We began taking our second dog to a "day care" in our neighborhood several times a week so he could be around other dogs. We also took him to local dog parks on weekends.

We've been fortunate that neither one was a "yappy" dog. Both had deep booming barks, and only barked when the doorbell rang. Our second dog would go out in the yard (through a doggy door) and bark at the neighbor's dogs through the fence (a regular conference call), and then strut back into the house, satisfied. He didn't bark at people, although when he did it was for attention and not anger.

They are also lap dogs that love to be touched. Both of ours slept in the bed with us, but I think that is a choice that we make.

-B
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by Barsoom »

S4C5 wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 2:38 pm
Barsoom wrote: Tue Jan 18, 2022 2:26 pm I was in a similar situation with an adopted mini dachshund while living in a second floor condo.

We litter-box trained our dog and used pellet-style dog litter. We put the pee pads around the litter box to catch any spillage, as our doxie got used to putting his front legs only in the box unless doing #2.

-B
Thanks. Can you comment on the temperament of these dogs? I will basically be the only human in his life. Will he be content in such a situation or will I be torturing the poor creature. I know some breeds would be a disaster in this situation. I was hoping he might work, but maybe not.
Also, there is a franchised company called Fetch Pet Care. They will come to your house and walk your dog, change the water, etc, and give your dog TLC.

-B
Mike Scott
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by Mike Scott »

Talk to the breeder about your options. If you signed a puppy contract, it almost certainly describes what happens with returns and refunds.
clip651
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Re: Puppy training recommendations when living alone

Post by clip651 »

OP, I agree with the many others who have said your current living conditions and work lifestyle are not appropriate for a dog, and particularly not for a young puppy. If you are unable to arrange doggie day care (as a long term solution), and make reasonable plans for housetraining your puppy, you are simply not able to adequately care for this dog, or any other dog at this point in time.

Please consider returning the pup to the breeder as soon as possible. This puppy only gets one shot at becoming a well socialized puppy, and you cannot provide that for him currently. Puppies need good training and good experiences with a variety of people early in their lives to grow up into well adjusted happy dogs. Please do not delay, time is of the essence for your puppy to have a really good chance at a really good life.

If you still would like a companion animal, cats are reasonable options for a single working person that is living in an apartment. But first do some research. Be sure that you like cats, and have the time and money to care for one (or two) and that you are willing to deal with litter boxes, vet visits, cat hair on the sofa, and the like. And that you are willing and interested in living with a cat (or two) for the next 10-20 years. Any pet is a long term commitment, but cats can live well into their teens. If you are interested in a cat, I would suggest getting an adult cat, or perhaps a bonded pair of adult cats, from a local shelter.

Many cats do well as single pets, so that' s fine option. The bonded pair would keep themselves company while you're gone, and they tend to be hard for shelters to place. Two different cats adopted at the same time might not get along with each other, and it's no fun living with cats that don't like each other. You do have to be prepared for double vet bills and more litter boxes if you have two cats, so think hard before going this route. I would not recommend a kitten for your current situation, as you don't have enough time to play with one, and kittens are more likely to get in trouble while you are at work, either damaging items in your house or injuring themselves by eating things they shouldn't, etc. Picking an adult cat from a shelter also allows you to pick one with the personality that appeals to you - cuddly, playful, outgoing, quiet, etc.

Something else for a single person to consider, getting a pet may affect who you date in the future. This isn't necessarily a bad thing. But if you adopt a cat or two, you will likely need/want to find a future partner who likes cats, isn't allergic, etc. In other words, think about the big picture about why you want a pet, and whether they will truly fit into your lifestyle for the next 10 plus years.

best wishes and let us know what you decide with your pup,
cj
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