celia wrote: ↑Fri Oct 15, 2021 11:51 pm
I think this would be better answered on another forum, such as
CollegeConfidential.com.
…
I would expect each private college would have their own level of support systems, different than other private schools. So that route would require more research.
Or you could approach this through special needs sources. That’s what I would do as the correct setting is more important for your child than likely any other criteria.
Agreed on all above.
cc site will have many posters who are students (get their perspective), parents, some in HS, in college and recent college graduates. They talk academics, search for “right fit”, and for people that hang around outcomes after college.
Resources for mental health will vary significantly, ask on that site. After acceptance, ok to inquire about their campus health resources. Another poster suggested limiting to local area colleges, that would be great to continue with medical resources your child may already feel comforting.
independence as well as social and academic pressures of college are all part of the learning experience, but do your best to judge just how much your child can handle, and keep monitoring, even when in college since you know there is already a problem now. Sometimes it’s hard to predict what works for a teenager and you may find you get feedback only after they start that requires course correction.
In my case, had 2 smart kids, one whom had severe adhd as a child, never thought early on he would go to a top school and succeed, but with proper treatment he settled down in HS and made it. College still presented challenges for him, more social than academic, and was glad he was just a 3 hour drive away. When he had tough times, was able to visit him or have him come home, but fortunately this was not required often. He could have gone to a low cost public but sent him to a mid size private that had the type of peers and activities that I thought would be a good personal fit, and it definitely helped him. They had poor medical resources on campus, but by college he didn’t want treatment anyway, he thought he was ready to go, and mostly he was.
OTOH, had kid who was even more of an academic achiever, had some social anxiety, but mostly seemed headed for a good college and no concerns about academics. Fit seemed important, also sent to a private where they had unusual themed dorms that would help him with social anxiety, and a large variety of intelligent high achieving peers. Well that did not turn out well at all. Socially we got it right, as that was our concern and we focused on it. But he eventually exhibited all kinds of anxiety over the sheer volume of work and deadlines. This was a college with a reputation for burying students with a very large load of work, but as my kid found HS easy, was not concerned at all. Well I should have been. He did graduate, and even got into an “intense” grad school program, but the anxiety grew each year, and developed depression too, then dropped out of the graduate school. This expensive uni had insufficient mental health resources, some students had to wait weeks or months to speak to someone in the student health center. And because it was in a rural area far from home, very limited off campus resources too. This was just before the explosion in telehealth so maybe today the rural location and lack of on campus resources might be less of an issue. But sometimes a crisis for an 18 or 19 year old also can be supported with some parental interaction, so more than a 3 hr drive and that option is limited.
Any way, depression and anxiety can be treatable but the social and academic pressured of college may make a difficult task even more difficult. As to saving more for a private school, don’t assume spending more gets you more. Both private schools I spent $ on were understaffed to help. Find local college with best fit, which may be private or public. You may consider saving for cost or private, but may not have to spend the $ if a local public school meets the needs. From a purely financial standpoint, one kid really benefited from the $ spent (adhd kid) but other did not due to it being wrong environment for someone with anxiety, and due to being so geographically isolated IMO. Chances are it’s not “worth it” to pay the private school costs if you think purely in terms of investment and career/salary outcomes,
as this is a high risk investment for a child with non-academic issues. But if a good environment exists for their personal needs and it helps them overcome, any price may be worthwhile.