Do you wear a wedding band? [at a job interview]

[JBTX]

[See my post below. --admin LadyGeek]

Mainly geared towards men, but applicable to women too, and also interested in the perceptions of women about men who don’t.

I got one and wore it early on, but it was a bit too big and I didn’t like the feel of it when washing hands or getting sweaty. I don’t even wear a watch anymore. So I just quit wearing it. My wife doesn’t care. She does wear her engagement ring, but it has a nice stone.

I never thought anything of it until doing job interviews recently and for some reason it occurred to me. Perhaps it was a female recruiter looking at my hand.

I recently tried it on again and unlike before it is now too tight.

Edit: I asked this primarily from a professional perspective, such as a job interview. Does the lack of a wedding ring on someone who is known to be married make you appear “flaky” or unreliable? Wondering if I should get it refit Just for such occasions.

[texasdiver]

Yes.

Plain gold band bought at Costco when we married 18 years ago. I basically haven't taken it off since

[livesoft]

Yes, for most of 35 years. There were months when I didn't wear it due to broken bones, surgery, and ORIF.

[triceratop]

Mainly geared towards men, but applicable to women too...

Mainly geared towards married men.

As I am unmarried, no I do not wear one. I hope this helps.

[tim1999]

No, I haven't worn it since the ceremony. My father never wore his either. I got an inexpensive one, knowing I'd never wear it again.

[sport]

My father never had one, so I did not want one. My bride did not object.

[quietseas]

I wore it for about a year. I was constantly twisting and pulling on it. I decided to stop wearing it. Spouse does not object.

[fizxman]

Yes. I bought myself a tungsten ring for $12 online after I got engaged.

A year or so ago, I was leaving for a few days on a work trip and was about halfway to the airport and realized I forgot to put on my ring. I turned around at the next exit and went home and got it. I only live 20 minutes from the airport and this was about 4:30 am so I wasn't worried about missing the flight. I felt guilty for forgetting it but I knew I would have felt really guilty for not having it while I was away.

[Flobes]

I am an unmarried woman.

I often wear a wedding ring when I travel.

[mouses]

In my experience married men who don't wear wedding rings don't want women to know they're married.

[mouses]

I am an unmarried woman.

I often wear a wedding ring when I travel.

Brilliant. That never occurred to me.

[bhsince87]

No. I did for a while. But when i started working around electronics and high powered stuff, it became a no-no.

I see that silicone bands are gaining some popularity, so that might be worth a look, I guess. But at this point, I don't see the point, really.

[Alexa9]

In my experience married men who don't wear wedding rings don't want women to know they're married.

Sometimes women are more interested in men with wedding rings.

[bondsr4me]

Yes I do.
Have been since the day I said “I do”.
Working on 31 this year.
I respect the symbolism of the ring.
Just old school, that’s all.

Don

[TomatoTomahto]

I am an unmarried woman.

I often wear a wedding ring when I travel.

I’m sure it doesn’t always work, but high five for effort.

I am a married man, and it’s the only jewelry I wear. I sometimes fiddle with it and move it to my index finger, so that I can massage the indentation that has grown in its “shadow,” but it never leaves my finger for more than a moment. I’m a sentimental kind of guy, and it means something to me.

[SpringMan]

Not currently, my fingers out grew my 1970 era wedding band. Ditto for my college ring which I bought in 1969. Ditto for my wife too. She had hers made bigger but due to arthritis in her knuckles she can't wear them. We are both okay with no rings, been married over 47 years.

[pennstater2005]

Yes. I initially hated the thought of wearing a ring. I never wore any type of jewelry. However, I decided to buy a size larger and so it never feels stuck on my finger. I can always just slide it right if it's freaking me out

[itstoomuch]

nope. neither does spouse.
We know who is married to whom, mostly.

[jhfenton]

Yes, for 25+ years. I lost my original wedding band, but I bought a few cheap, but attractive tungsten rings and wear one of them except when I'm sleeping or showering (and sometimes then).

[halfnine]

Generally, neither of us wear a band/ring. But we do when we travel to more culturally reserved countries so as not to construe we are an unmarried couple sharing a room.

[bottlecap]

Mainly geared towards men, but applicable to women too...

Mainly geared towards married men.

As I am unmarried, no I do not wear one. I hope this helps.

???

My father lost his and never replaced it. I wear mine almost all the time so I don’t lose it. It’s never bothered me.

JT

[Frisco Kid]

I do not, wife of 42 years is ok with that......

[radeon962]

Yes simple gold band worn for the past 25 years.

[squirm]

No, but my wife wears hers.

[nisiprius]

Yes. Plain gold band. This is my third one; I lost two of them in amateur theatrical productions, it seems as if directors always have some reason why your character wouldn't wear one. I paid about the same amount for each of them--$30. My first had a brushed "Florentine" finish on it, and it was some fairly pure kind of gold, and the finish wore off and the ring became completely shiny in about ten years. The third one is a very plain gold band that's about one step up from a Cracker Jack toy. It's 10 karat gold and thus very durable. It's so old that the chain of stores I bought it from, Service Merchandise, doesn't exist any more. Well, maybe these days that isn't necessarily very old.

I said I paid about $30 for each but I'm not quite telling the truth: my hand got too big for the ring a few years ago, and I had it resized, and that cost over $90.

[smitcat]

I have not worn mine the past 30+ years.

[Grt2bOutdoors]

In my experience married men who don't wear wedding rings don't want women to know they're married.

Sometimes women are more interested in men with wedding rings.

I have experienced that.

Yes, I do wear mine except when I am working with tools or in the garden where scratching and gouging are distinct possibilities.

[nhdean]

I di dat first, but it was too big. On one of my Iceland trips my wife wanted this one particular ring. It happened to be a wedding set. I wore the ring up until last month when I lost it some where. I wore that one for 5 years.

[retiredjg]

... and also interested in the perceptions of women about men who don’t.

From a woman's view point.....


A man who does not wear a ring might be unmarried. This does not mean he is "available". He might be in a committed relationship.

Or he might be married and just not like rings.

Or he might be married and doing things that are dangerous with rings - meaning loss of a finger.

Or he may be married and not committed and interested in something on the side.

Or he may just not be interested in women.




A man who does wear a ring is probably married. This does not mean he is "unavailable". Many are available, but such men are best avoided.

A man who does (or does not) wear a ring may not be interested in women at all. He may be married to another man.

Or even if he is interested in women, he may not be interested in my age group or my "type" or me in general or me in specific.


Long story short....a man with a ring can mean almost anything. And a man without a ring can mean almost anything..

Do whatever you and your "other" are comfortable with and don't worry about it.

[pennstater2005]

I know someone who has a few of the cheap silicone wedding bands that he bought off of Amazon. They're nice looking.

[MarkBarb]

No. I tried for a few days. My wife took it away because she saw that it irritated me. I've never worn any jewelry. I'm one of the only Texas Aggies I know that didn't buy a school ring.

My wife wore her wedding ring until she lost it. Then she wore mine until she lost it. They cost a total of $70, so it wasn't a big loss. She then spent $8 on a replica of the One Ring from the Lord of the Rings and wears that. Now I'm afraid that if I wear a ring, I'll become a wraith under her control.

[fishandgolf]

I did the first few years but haven't since. Had a friend who worked in construction.... got the ring caught in a nail and darn near torn off the entire hand..........he no longer wears his either.

[uberdoc]

I wore for one day. Doing 5 surgeries a day made it impossible to handle so I gave up, the ring. Now I wear it on formal occasions...but not always.

[JBTX]

Thanks for the responses. I am surprised by the number of men that don’t. I’m not as much of an outlier as I thought.

[jehovasfitness]

Married 9 yrs and only wear it maybe once per year on special occasions.

[JBTX]

Mainly geared towards men, but applicable to women too...

Mainly geared towards married men.

As I am unmarried, no I do not wear one. I hope this helps.

Thanks for the clarification!

[jehovasfitness]

In my experience married men who don't wear wedding rings don't want women to know they're married.

Likely. But then some men think it may help them. I just hate wearing any type of accessories

[JBTX]

No, I haven't worn it since the ceremony. My father never wore his either. I got an inexpensive one, knowing I'd never wear it again.

Interesting. My father mostly didn’t wear his either. That seems to be a trend based on a few posts.

[cfs]

Just like the 7-UP, never had it, never will, married for almost 50yrs, wearing no rings, no watches. Always wearing my neck chain with dog tag with my name, country, one of my daughter's name and phone number, so that she can be notified if someone finds me laying at room temperature on the camino. Gracias por leer / cfs

[JBTX]

In my experience married men who don't wear wedding rings don't want women to know they're married.

Sometimes women are more interested in men with wedding rings.

I have heard both of these perspectives before. As to the second, perhaps it represents a sort of “seal of approval”. If one person likes him, he can’t be all bad. Or perhaps it represents safety, in this guy is less likely to hit on me.

I’ll say this, if my motivations were nefarious, which they certainly aren’t, not wearing a ring from that perspective hasn’t worked.

[PhysicsTeacher]

My husband and I wear silicone bands. He's an electrician who can't wear a metal ring to work. The silicone rings do wear out and need to be replaced every few years, but I think the ones we got from SafeRingz are nice looking and well worth the money. I've gotten quite a few compliments from teenage students on my "cool ring", especially when I respond to questions about what it is made of by stretching and squishing it.

[ACA]

Mine has NEVER come off my finger since “I do”.

I think it’s platinum and all I know is it reduces scratches and dings very well. I’m a man that does manly things (built my Jeep, all maintenance on our cars and boats, all yard work and tree cutting, built a house...) and it still looks new.

[randomizer]

I wear it but it is uncomfortable.

[TheEternalVortex]

Neither my wife nor I wear one. We don’t like the feel of rings. Somehow we haven’t forgotten that we’re married yet.

[steve roy]

I wear a low-cost substitute ring.

As I lost weight, my fingers shrank and my original gold band developed a bad habit of flying off every time I washed my hands. So Mrs. Steve Roy bought me a brushed tungsten and rose gold replacement* ($19 on the intertoobs) which I have worn the last several years. The original, high-priced ring sits in a jewelry box.

* Actually it's the SECOND replacement: the first downsized specimen ALSO flew off my hands, so the next one was even smaller. Now I'm fine.

[SmileyFace]

I don't leave the house without it - if I didn't have it on I would have to beat the women off with a stick.

[VictoriaF]

... and also interested in the perceptions of women about men who don’t.

From a woman's view point.....


A man who does not wear a ring might be unmarried. This does not mean he is "available". He might be in a committed relationship.

Or he might be married and just not like rings.

Or he might be married and doing things that are dangerous with rings - meaning loss of a finger.

Or he may be married and not committed and interested in something on the side.

Or he may just not be interested in women.




A man who does wear a ring is probably married. This does not mean he is "unavailable". Many are available, but such men are best avoided.

A man who does (or does not) wear a ring may not be interested in women at all. He may be married to another man.

Or even if he is interested in women, he may not be interested in my age group or my "type" or me in general or me in specific.


Long story short....a man with a ring can mean almost anything. And a man without a ring can mean almost anything..

Do whatever you and your "other" are comfortable with and don't worry about it.

This is a nice realistic analysis, retiredjg. But my visceral reactions are binary. If a man has a ring, he is off limits. If a man does not have a ring, and I like him, I explore further.

Victoria

[LadyGeek]

This thread has run its course and is locked (relationship issue). As a reminder, see: Acceptable Topics and Subforum Guidelines

This is an investing and personal finance forum. We also maintain a subforum that allow our members to discuss consumer goods and services and recreational activities. Anything else is considered "Off Topic" and is not acceptable on this forum.

Update: See below.

[LadyGeek]

After receiving a PM from the OP, I retitled the thread to clarify the intent. "Do you wear a wedding band during a job interview?"

This thread is now unlocked to continue the discussion. Please stay focused on the work environment.

[quietseas]

In that case I think its fine to wear a wedding band -- but don't twiddle or fidget with it! Better to take it off than fidget or twiddle if you do that.